The Only Father I'll Ever Have

The most memorable person in my life is my father; his actions shaped the path of my life. My life has taken its course due to his stories and guidance. I grew up all over the world because he was in the army. My father spent two and a half years fighting in Vietnam. He had many emotional scars I didn't understand myself until much later on. The only thing I knew as a kid was that when I ran into his bedroom in the middle of the night with a fruit basket on my head yelling words like “Di di moa!” he would roll onto the floor and I would just laugh! He never got upset about it, my mom on the other hand always got fairly mad, partly because she knew how this messed with my father and partly because I kept waking her up.

                Whenever I had questions he had answers or sage advice at the ready. It was April 15^th 1985 when we had the sex talk; our neighbors had little girls, just old enough to walk, outside naked. I ran back inside confused, I had no idea what was going on over there so I asked my dad why they didn't have what I did have. The reason I remember the date so well is because of his answer, he was always doing things at the last minute. He answered simply, “Your thing goes in it but not until you’re married now leave me alone, I’m doing taxes.”

                There were many other things about my father that leave me laughing and many things that make me proud. After he retired from the military in 1988 we didn't have very much money. My mother, father, brother, myself, and a German Shepherd all lived in a Winnebago for 4 months before moving into a motel room and then finally renting a house. My dad made $9000 that year. His dream was to teach at MTSU but the Aerospace department wasn't very big and had all the faculty they needed.  He was a pretty tenacious dude when it came to his dreams though. He wound up writing a couple new courses and they eventually got approved, he was hired on as an adjunct to teach them.  It had been a very long year of scraping by but we weren't done yet. 

My father toiled in factories and warehouses making what he could to support his family while he waited to get on full time. Eventually he was hired on full time with the university and then tenured and is still living his dream to this day. That was a powerful lesson I've always remembered throughout my life, try hard, work hard, don’t take no as long as there’s still a yes out there. Later on after my many years of poor choices (which he always stood by me and suffered with me) I decided to join the military and when I joined the National Guard he not only supported me, he swore me into service. When my brother joined the military and graduated basic training, my father was there to pin his blue cord on his shoulder showing he had joined the fraternity of infantrymen. Later on down the road my brother advanced his career and became an officer, again my father was there to commission him into the officer corps.

 Throughout mine and all my brothers’ lives he has always been supportive in all our endeavors, even if he didn't completely agree. Throughout mine and my brother’s multiple deployments he has been a constant support for my mother and our families. I honestly don’t know how they would have fared without him. He tells some of the corniest jokes known to man but he’s smiling and laughing while he tells them so you wind up laughing whether you want to or not. He has always loved us so much it was sometimes embarrassing. He always supported us growing up and he always supports us now, no matter what we do. He doesn't have an ounce of hate in his heart and he’s never met a stranger. He has four semi-screwed up sons that he thinks are absolutely perfect and we have a semi-screwed up dad that we know is absolutely perfect.