Tuesday, May 8, 2012

The Manly Arts


So I was drinking pink lemonade today and I got to thinking about some things.  What’s more manly, the fact that I can kill and clean an animal and take it from woods to the table or that I love drinking pink lemonade?  I have in the past mentioned how important I believe the manly arts are.  In fact, I believe they are slowly disappearing and should be saved with all expedience!  I would almost be willing to start a summer camp and charge metros a very large fee to wear plaid and learn how to chop wood and gut animals, how to properly handle rifles and pistols, the correct methods for grilling meat, and a myriad of other endangered arts.  I also believe that pink lemonade is one of America’s greatest inventions right beside the ice cream cone and movies.  I have heard way too many men refuse to drink pink lemonade because of its color and that’s fine, it leaves more for me!  Perhaps a man who refuses to drink pink lemonade is in fact no man at all, most men who I know that do enjoy a nice glass of pink lemonade also hunt, fish, and hold the door open for ladies.  I would say that if you want to judge a man you should ask him his feelings on this fine beverage.  If he is highly offended that you would suggest such a thing then perhaps he needs to own more plaid shirts or blue jeans.  I am announcing to the whole world that the art of manliness begins and ends with the willingness to choose a drink for its taste, not its color!  I think a manly man would be more than secure enough to say there’s a great many refreshments available but the pink ones are usually tasty and delicious!  Before anyone decides to judge me too harshly let’s remember a few things.  I can ride a horse or a motorcycle.  I can drive the heck out of just about anything with tracks or tires.  I am a highly proficient marksman with American and foreign weapons.  I can kill, cook, and eat just about anything with legs (you can’t spell meat without eat).  I would be willing to teach these things to “men” who don’t know how for an outrageous fee as well.  I’m just saying that when it comes to drinking on a weekday after 10am and before 5pm then there is no way you can go wrong with pink lemonade guys!!!!

10 comments:

  1. Popping in to grumble about how the color pink got associated with women and femininity... *grumble* *grumble* *marketing* *grumble* *stupid 1950s* *grumble*

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  2. Well said GL. Pink lemonade is a staple beverage. I keep packets of it at my desk for afternoon refreshment and keep a pitcher of Kool-Aid in the fridge at home which comes in a variety of lovely colors. Main point, when you need a refreshing drink after working in the yard, hammering stuff or changing the oil it beats the heck out of water.

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  3. I'm glad my feelings on pink lemonade are so well received! Hahaha!

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